


never let go

by h8tedhannah



Category: 13 Reasons Why (TV)
Genre: Gay, M/M, Tumblr: zalexweek2k20
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:42:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25138651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/h8tedhannah/pseuds/h8tedhannah
Summary: After Alex’s attempt, Zach becomes his shining night in armor and never leaves his side. He comforts Alex during nightmares when he needs it most.Zalex week day 2: Sharing a bed
Relationships: Zach Dempsey & Alex Standall, Zach Dempsey/Alex Standall
Kudos: 31





	never let go

Finally after being practically carried up by a team of nurses and being hoisted up the stairs in a mess of pain and failed attempts, Alex was finally laying in his bed. His head was propped up along with his immobile leg, and his parents had finally left the room. His head swirled as he looked around the room; it was his first day home from the hospital and his memories were still fuzzy and blurry. He saw a few flashbacks of Jess, Hannah, and his parents, but he was having a hard time remembering what kind of relationship he had with them. He reached for a photo album on the side on his dresser, hoping to unlock some of those repressed memories. He didn’t remember why exactly he tried to shoot himself, as the memory was faded; but he remembers one thing, he did it because he ruined the life of one of his friends. Hannah Baker. He scrolled through pictures on the photo album, his thumb tracing the faces of people that looked firmilar but that had no emotional meaning to him. His eyes landed on Jess; he knew she was somewhat important to who he was in the past; yet he had no emotions of love as he looked through the many pictures they had together. She was beautiful yes, but Alex couldn’t physically feel anything, not even a blush or an increase of heart rate. His fingers turned a page to a picture of a group of guys, the jocks. Alex sat on a couch along with someone he knew who’s name started with an M, along with another boy, he didn’t exactly remember him but he knew he hated him. He knew this boy was a very bad person. His eyes glanced up to the 3rd boy in the picture, an tall asian boy with jet black hair sat next to the group, a charming and perfect smile on his face. His hair was ever so slightly wet, and the picture was taken right as a droplet sunk down to his neck. Underneath the poloroid, the name read “Zach Dempsey” He remembered seeing the boy quite a few times in the hospital, he often stayed very late and talked about football a lot, but really he was one of the only few guys that came to visit Alex after his attempt. It was kind of strange, considering he was a jock, but Alex loved his company. He had helped him remember the names of people at school, and sometimes even snuck in coffee that Alex wasn’t supposed to be having. But really, he didn’t know the Zach kid other than that, but he was very curious to know more about him. 

If alex was being honest, he had started to develop a bit of a crush on the boy. 

Sure, there was Jess still in his life, but it’s like Alex had shot out the part of his brain that loved her. He couldn’t remember a single moment where he felt in love with her; but with Zach being the only other person his age to came to visit him every single day; the only guy he saw for months, just the thought of Zach being around him made his stomach fill with butterflies. 

A knock was at his door and it opened

Speak of the devil.

“Hey man! Woah- I’ve never seen your room before- really only your living room but wow it’s sick!” Zach said, stumbling in and admiring the posters like a golden retriever puppy. “Yeah..thanks. I guess it’s a change from being in a hospital all the time.” Alex replied with a laugh. Zach sat on an office chair besides the bed and started spinning around like a child. “Yeah, I bet the beds more comfortable too. This chair is way more fun than the wooden one in ICU.” Alex laughed at that, remembering how tired Zach looked after spending the night there after his surgery, yet still managing to crack that bright smile Alex loved. But he stared at the floor in thought. Now that Alex was home and somewhat able to get around on crutches alone; did that mean Zach would leave him and return back to his jock, asshole friends, and stop visiting everyday? Would he still say hey when Alex eventually went back to school? Or would he pretend like he never was close with Alex for the sake of his popularity? “Yo, whats up? You look like you’re about cry or something. Talk to me.” Alex looked up at the boy. It was late and getting dark. The curtains were open along with the windows, and the light from the moon bounced off of Zachs perfect porcelain skin, the slight breeze causing his front hair strands to sway slightly. His dark eyes met Alex’s light ones as Zach stood and made his way over to the bed. He sat down next to Alex, putting his hand on Alex’s knee, sending shivers of butterflies all over Alexs body. “I don’t know. I mean I’m out of the hospital, I’m alive; but not normal. What the hell do I do now Zach?” He asked, eyes filling with tears at the thought of how he’d never recover. “That’s uh- what I wanted to talk to you about actually.” Zach replied, resting his arm on the bed header next to Alex. “I talked to your parents a little while ago and I know you wanted to work on recovery; so I offered to start doing physical therapy lessons for you. We’ll meet everyday, you can ride in the Audi, and I’ll be taking you to and from school when you go back.” He said with a smile. Alex’s breath hitched. He’d be spending every single day with Zach, every single hour almost. He didn’t hate the thought, but he was terrified of the millions of ways that it could go. “So my parents are going to pay you to babysit me?” He responded with a nervous smile. “No. Actually I’m doing all the physical therapy for free. And no, I’m not gonna ask you to put out or anything, your hand doesn’t even work man.” Alexs mouth dropped open and his brows furrowed together. “Youre crazy! Why would you go out of your way for free? There’s no way you actually care about me without wanting at least something back.” He said, possibly too aggressively. There was silence for a moment and Zach turned to look at his friend. “Look. It may seem like that- but I really seriously care about you. You don’t know it- but I really felt horrible when I heard what happened to you, but most importantly I wanted to help you. I dont know why, maybe it was because of Hannah, or maybe because of- well I don’t know. I want to show you and give you a reason to live Alex. Life is beautiful, and it sounds strange since i barley knew you before, but I want to show you that.” Alex didn’t break eye contact with him, nor say anything at all. He just looked at Zach, the jock he once thought of as a brainless background character, now his world of hope and belonging. “You’re not just some charity case.. and I know you don’t exactly remember everything from the past, but I- I care about you. I’m your friend man.” Zach said. They were now inches apart and Zachs arm was around Alex. Alex wanted to kiss him right them and there, but he knew Zach was as straight as a ruler and probably had a girlfriend and a whole different life at school and revolving the Bryce Walker case. There was so much other shit going on that would affect them but right now, it was Zach and Alex against the world. 

It was now 2am, way past the time they were supposed to be up. “Dude! Seriously I play better than you and my body doesn’t even work properly.” Alex said, throwing the controller down. “Whatever, you’ve died more times than me!” Zach said with a laugh. He fell back onto the bed alongside Alex and stared at the ceiling before turning to look at Alex, and their eyes locked. “It’s late. You can stay.” Alex said. “Um- yeah I’ll sleep on the floor.” Zach said starting to rise up from the bed. Alex felt disappointed, he hoped for them to sleep together. “Oh okay. Yeah. Goodnight.” He said, he blushed and tried to turn away in efforts to hide his blush as Zach took off his shirt, revealing his athlete body. 

Alex stood in the mirror with a gun in his hand.   
Slowly and through tears, he put the gun to his head and released the safety. “3.2....1.” 

BOOM 

“FUCK! FUCK!” Alex screamed, rising up in bed and almost falling off. He grasped the sides of the bed weakly, but he started to loose balance and felt his body slipping. He felt his leg hit the floor and he screamed. If he hit his head, that’s it. His life would be over. Suddenly he felt a pair of warm arms around him; preventing him from hitting the ground. Zach pushed him up and grabbed him, picking him up like a bride on a wedding day, and slowly set him back on the bed. “Hey look at me. Alex look at me.” Alex felt like he couldn’t breathe so he just had a panic attack while clutching his arms on Zachs strong shoulders. “It’s okay. You’re okay. I’m here. Breathe with me.” He collapsed into Zachs arms, pulling him down onto the bed and crying into him. Zach whispered to him and stroked his head; not letting Alex go. Alex continued to cry and say nothing back to Zach, but once the sniffles lessened he whispered to Zach, “Please. Don’t let go. I’ll fall.” He said. Zach smiled and kissed the top of his head. He didn’t know why he did, in fact he actually wanted to kiss his lips instead for some unspeakable reason, but decided to just lay there with Alex, their arms tightly wrapped around eachother; neither even dreaming of ever letting go. 

So as the sun began to rise and the school day came along, Zach didn’t move. He ditched the morning at school and stared at sleeping Alex for a bit, admiring every little thing about him. Their fingers were still intertwined and as Alex began to wake Zach watched his eyes flutter and his fingers slowly move away. “Hey.” “Goodmorning.” “Don’t you have to go to school Zach? It’s already 10.” Alex asked, moving a piece of hair out of his face. “Nah, I uh, I think I like it better here. Like this. You know- so you don’t fall.”


End file.
